i broke the rules

Vignette | leaning into the soft parts of motherhood

This is a little something I wrote while in the Dolomites this past July about leaning in to the soft parts of motherhood and relaxing about doing everything “right”.

Photo credit: Alexandra Wendt

I broke the rules today.
I brought them into bed with me
as the early morning mists rose up behind the pine trees.

"He'll never nurse to sleep,"
yet I let him suckle there,
his tiny fists burrowed into the coverlets.

"No kids in bed," I said,
but what can I do about the little arms reaching toward me
in a silent plea?

It's five a.m.,
and I may not know sleep,
but I know the press of a newborn's head
against my chin,
and the gentle nuzzle of a toddler's cheek.

"The years are short," my grandma always said;
and perhaps it was her I was thinking about,
sitting alone on the porch, telephone in hand
as the lone tether to her own,
when I brought my kids into bed
and broke the rules,
just this once,
on a cold morning in the Dolomites.